Growing up in challenging circumstances, from a refugee camp to finding refuge again from violence in the streets of Yei, life has taught me a valuable secret: to live a happier life, we must allow ourselves to be happy. It’s not about forcing happiness or pretending, but rather granting ourselves permission to embrace happiness.

• Embrace Failure as a Stepping Stone: One common source of unhappiness is the fear of failure. It’s important to remember that failure is a natural part of life and growth. Embrace the fact that you might stumble along the way, but view each setback as an opportunity to learn and grow stronger. When you accept failure as part of the journey, it becomes a stepping stone to success, bringing you closer to happiness.

• Face the Fear of an Uncertain Future with Courage: Another factor that often hinders our happiness is the fear of an uncertain future. While it’s okay to be afraid and cautious, don’t let fear overpower your happiness. Take a moment to pause, reflect, and gather your strength, but never give up on your dreams. Believe that everything will eventually work out, and let happiness guide you through life’s uncertainties.

• Embrace Imperfections and Lighten Up: I have personally encountered the feeling of inadequacy, much like many others. However, I choose to be happy by accepting that perfection is not attainable. Embrace your imperfections and realize that it’s okay not to have everything figured out. Lighten up and don’t take yourself too seriously all the time – happiness often thrives in a relaxed and self-accepting mindset.

• Acknowledge the Value in Others: Remember, you are valuable, but you are not the center of the universe. Acknowledge that others shine in their own ways, just like you do in yours. Focus on adding value to your life and the lives of others, and you’ll find contentment and happiness.

• Embrace the Journey of Learning and Growing: Feeling uninformed or unsure can also be a source of unhappiness. As a hustler, I learned that it’s okay not to have all the answers. Embrace the fact that you don’t know everything and that you are on your unique journey. Instead of letting it burden you, use this realization to motivate yourself to learn and grow. Happiness comes from knowing yourself and accepting your journey, no matter how different it may be from others.

• Shift Your Focus from Thorns to Flowers: Finally, let me share a story that resonates with me as a former member of the Seventh-day Adventist (SDA) community:
  “I dreamed that I was in a garden, and one who seemed to be the owner of the garden was leading me through its paths. I was gathering the flowers and enjoying their fragrance when a fellow sister, who had been walking by my side, drew my attention to some unsightly briers that were obstructing her way. She was mourning and grieving, saying, ‘Oh, is it not a pity that this beautiful garden is spoiled with thorns?’ Then the guide said, ‘Let the thorns be, for they will only wound you. Gather the roses, the lilies, and the pinks.’” (Steps to Christ pp. 116-117)

This story reminds us that we sometimes make ourselves unhappy in life’s metaphorical garden of flowers by focusing on the thorns rather than enjoying the fragrances and gathering the flowers. The thorns represent the aspects that bring us unhappiness. Always shift your focus towards the positives, and you’ll find happiness blooming all around you. This story has guided me on the path to finding happiness.

In conclusion, my dear friend, I welcome you to the path of happiness. Embrace the simple secret: allow yourself to be happy. Embrace failures as stepping stones, face fears with courage, accept your imperfections, acknowledge the value in others, and focus on learning and growing. Finally, shift your focus from the thorns to the flowers in life’s garden. By doing so, you’ll find true happiness and contentment. Welcome to a happier life!